It may feel strange to chronicle your failures, but I believe that open dialogue about the struggles of academia are important. One way I remind myself to celebrate the victories is to keep track of how hard it was to get there. Below is my "CV of Failures" describing the awards and jobs I've applied to but didn't receive and the hardship of getting my (first author only) manuscripts published. This list certainly doesn't generalize to others and I respect the privilege I have in my position and my life experiences to get where I am today. Hopefully by sharing this information publicly, trainees appreciate that failure is normal, failure is acceptable, and failure is encouraged. You can't win if you don't play.

Academic and professional opportunities I was not offered
  • Admission to Penn State University Park for undergrad - 2009
  • Numerous summer research experiences across the US - 2010
  • Admission to graduate programs at UC Davis and Baylor College of Medicine - 2014
  • Postdoctoral Associateships - 2019
    • Cleveland Clinic (rejected after 6 interviews)
    • UC San Francisco (no interview)
    • US Food and Drug Administration (no interview)
    • Brigham and Women’s Hospital (no interview)

​Scientific works and their rejection rate (first author only)
  • Wendt, et al. 2014 (PMID 27075592) rejected from 3 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2016 (PMID 27075592) rejected from 3 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2017 (PMID 29075918) rejected from 2 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2018 (PMID 30507617) rejected from 3 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2019 (PMID 30971809) rejected from 4 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2019 (PMID 31766499) rejected from >12 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2020 (PMID 32941431) rejected from 10 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2020 (PMID 33349686) rejected from 2 journals 
  • Wendt, et al. 2020 (PMID 33278486) rejected from 5 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2021 (PMID 33665242) rejected from 7 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2021 (PMID 33837531) rejected from 3 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2021 (PMID 34966408) rejected from 5 journals
  • Wendt, et al. 2022 (PMID 35181757) rejected from 3 journals

Awards and grants I did not receive
  • Pre-doctoral fellowship from National Institute of Justice - 2017
  • Nature Communications Journals Early Career Travel Award - 2019
  • Society of Biological Psychiatry Travel Fellowship - 2019
  • World Congress of Psychiatric Genetics Travel Award - 2019
  • Brown-Coxe Fellowship - 2019
  • NIMH F32 (1st submission; score = 30) - 2019
  • Thrasher Research Fund Early Career Investigator Award - 2019
  • Society of Biological Psychiatry Travel Fellowship - 2020
  • UK Biobank Early Career Researcher of the Year Award - 2020
  • Tourette Association of America Young Investigator Award - 2020
  • NARSAD Brain and Behavior Research Foundation Young Investigator Grant - 2020
  • WCPG Early Career Investigator Program Travel Award - 2020
  • Blavatnik Regional Award for Young Investigators - 2020
  • F.J. McGuigan ECI Research Grant on Understanding the Human Mind - 2020
  • Blavatnik Regional Award for Young Investigators - 2021
  • American Foundation for Suicide Prevention Young Investigator Award (1st submission) - 2021
  • Yale-SCORE on Sex Difference in Alcohol Use Disorder Pilot Award - 2021
  • NIMH K99/R00 (1st submission; score = 30) - 2021
  • WCPG Early Career Investigator Program Travel Award - 2021
  • UK Biobank Early Career Researcher of the Year Award - 2021